Divorce Stigma

Are Separation and Divorce Still Embarrassing Today?

A married couple goes through many difficulties through a marriage. There are the happy years, but then things happen that disrupt the happiness. Sometimes the marriages end with legal separation or divorce. You would think that this happens so much today that people would not feel any embarrassment over this. However, some still feel there is a stigma on those who have a marriage that fails. Why is this?

The Couple Promise through Vows

According to experts like an Orange County divorce lawyer with many years of experience in the field, couples make certain promises through vows and when they no longer feel like they can live up to these vows other people may judge them harshly or see it as a failure. Even when these couples do not want to feel embarrassed, other people’s reactions make them feel that they have done something wrong. Many couples say these vows in church, which gives them religious meaning as well as legal meaning. This may only add to the embarrassment, especially with their church friends.

The Men May Get Teased

Men may get embarrassed over their marriages dissolving because other men will tease them about not being able to hold onto their women. Not all the men want the divorce in the first place, so the teasing could make them feel a bit awkward and self-conscious. Some men know how to laugh off this type of teasing, which eases the uncomfortable feelings.

The Kids

When kids are present in a troubled marriage their friends could pick and tease them about their parents going their separate ways. This could cause the kids to hide the fact if they can. Yes, the embarrassment could affect the kids as well as the couple. The couple of the affected kids will have to love and guide them through this difficult time.
Also, there are those people who will judge the couples who are separating stating they should stay together for the sake of the children. These people may go as far to say how dare they put their kids through the upset of a dissolution of a marriage. Couples who come up against these people will get embarrassed or angry.

Sometimes Depressing Feelings Occur

If the divorcing partners do not feel embarrassment over their divorce, one or both of them may have depressing feelings of loss of a loved one. The partners may not automatically quit caring about each other any longer just because they admit their marriage is not working. This will cause the partner who is still feeling love to miss the other one.

A Feeling of Failure Brings Embarrassment

It is normal for the partners going through a separation to feel a sense of failure. Their marriage was supposed to last forever and now just a few years after they spoke their vows the marriage is ending. This feeling of failure makes also for embarrassment at the fact the marriage is ending. No one likes to fail at anything including marriage.

You may be going through the process with a divorce lawyer Orange County right now and feeling a bit of embarrassment over this fact. However, you know whether you have valid reasons for doing this act. It is not up to others to judge your actions and make you feel awkward or self-conscious about having to separate from your spouse permanently through this legal process. There are many logical reasons to end a marriage. You could have become incompatible over time or your partner may have been involved with someone else. Do not look for approval in someone else’s eyes. Understand that you are doing what is right for you and do not be embarrassed about it.

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